Step 6: Contact

Your commitment to connecting to the people around you is a reflection of how you feel about yourself.

Character is made from yourself.

Reputation is what other people think of you.

You need contact with other people to build a character that doesn’t give a shit about reputation.

You willingness to see beyond the faults, choices, and habits of others is directly related to how well you accept the faults in your own existence.

In a single lifetime, we’re introduced to several different kinds of people. If we are true to ourselves and others, we can make each interaction a spiritual one. Find something to offer and/or something new to learn from these exchanges. Use them as opportunities to be present and connected so that you may see yourself in someone else. Pushing human contact and connection, friendly or romantic, away is dysfunctional, and has perhaps been imparted to you by someone else’s disaffection.

Connecting with others is natural. Wanting to prolong connection with someone is not a sign of weakness. Wanting to advance your current mode of contact into something more is not needy.

Things to do when you want to talk to someone.

1. Stop making a story about whether someone should call you first, or if it has been enough time to feel like you have the green light. This goes for both men and women. It does not limit your individuality or independence to reach out to someone. You should be secure in who you are that you can literally give pieces of you away as you are limitless.

2. Call them. A dial-pad is not a deadly weapon. Making someone’s phone ring is not a crime. Texting is not whole communication and you are not breaking a boundary just because you haven’t spoken on the phone yet. It never was and never will be despite how normalized it may have become in modern interactions.

3. The energetic exchange of human contact allows you to be vulnerable and you grants the person whom you are communicating with the chance to surrender and show themselves.



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Meaningful contact defines boundaries, breaks down walls, and is an opportunity for people to show themselves. But, when and how to reach out to someone is a huge point of contention for many people.

…”It’s been three days?”

“He still hasn’t responded…..”

“…..How could she like my post but not tell me about this weekend.”

Contact is a necessity for all, despite how this need looks different for each person. It is the only way we settle into stability if and when we are building trust with someone.

Choosing a mode of contact causes unnecessary stress and anxiety. Life is hard as it is. Don’t add this to the list. If you feel like offering a hug, do it. If you want to slip your hand into someone else’s, go for it. Stroke hair, brush a cheek. Your skin is the largest organ of the body and it responds to touch.

Human vibration is essential, like sunlight to a plant.

Ways you may be hindering your own growth or others by controlling and changing the nature of human contact.

1. You feel on the outside. No one gets you. These “outlier” feelings of alienating and are misguiding you. They are keeping you away from the healing vibrations of other humans. Don’t Do It. And don’t push this idea on someone else.

2. When you close yourself off from others, you close yourself off from what they know and think about, what they are creating and nurturing. You cannot be part of it nor can you share the things you know.

3. If the idea of others causes you to worry that they may interfere and negatively influence your relationship. I can share with you the age old wisdom, “To worry, is to suffer twice.”

If you are pushing people away and out of your life and demanding your significant other to isolate themselves so that you may gain confidence and security. Your fear is impairing you. Your insecurities are negatively impacting your partner’s sensibilities the power of your relationship will be diminished.

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Step 3 : Wisdom

Step 3 of 12: See Step 2 Loyalty

Wisdom – To be wise or to be open to wisdom.

These are not the same things. It is thought to be wise when one uses logical analysis, or reasoning. It is widely accepted that wisdom arrives through experience, but doesn’t this leave out the innate sensitivity or cultivated sensibility of awareness.     What if:

To be aware is to be human.

To be human is to be always listening.

Wisdom is eternally and spontaneously arising in life and only needs acknowledgement and reflection to become part of your experience.

If you allow yourself the opportunity to create your own experience, you will see that Gurus are around you all the time. They can come in any forms. But, one must begin by understanding that cutting corners on your life is not an option: Practice Asteya  Read: Understanding the Mind,  Body, and Spirit, how each of them connect and  Pantanjali’s 8 Limbs. 

Gurus are vehicles – they are some sign –  some observational moment where light shines on your darkness. Where you’re guided away from a strong emotion and into a calm abiding. Gurus can be an animal, song, child, scent, or memory. It’s a spirit with a message for you in a language you understand and in the corner of a looking place you regularly see and already waiting in destinations you haven’t yet stumbled upon. By being open, (not resisting or attaching to one particular outcome – yamas) opportunities will flourish, manifesting thoughts into reality, and bringing your future to you..

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Your Higher self can pick up sounds, vibrations, and symbols as this is what your spirit speaks, and if you   listen and work at becoming a better listener – even see your being’s purpose as a receiver- you will tap into this consciousness.

“The front part of the body receives information and the back side of the body passes it on. We are receivers of memory, listening stations of cosmic truths in the here and now, and senders to the future. With the front we face situations, we face life, we walk into things, we meet people face on. The front receives heat from psychic energy, and the backside is the cold “chi” releasing side. That is why we have a front side and back side of the body.

We are little broadcasting stations that openly bridge the future while washing all our moments with memory. That is how we know things. We are simply actors in this life unfolding before us and, as we face life, we leave behind our trail of moments for those who come behind us to resonate to.”

-Joseph Rael & Mary Elizabeth Marlow from ‘Being and Vibration

Wisdom is a noun.

It is as a thing to be attained, but it is also a direction to be pursued, a characteristic to acquire, a perception someone may carry with them, an impression you wish to impart on someone else and it is a feeling of serendipity, a perfect alignment with cosmic energies.

Wisdom is gracefully connecting you to your personal evolution. Every moment is a moment to be cultivating how you play with and manifest energy. The beauty of life is to experience (and learn from) yourself.

The energy of Wisdom centers you in your body, but gives you access to experiences outside the physical plane.

 

Swadhyaya (Niyama #4)

Swadhyaya – स्वाध्याय – Self-Study

Does practicing Swadhyaya tell us to study the self, or to regularly practice studying?  Yes. Both of course.

You immediately make a face, you don’t wanna study.Image result for sad child girl face

“You don’t want to learn, you’re done with school.”

“You don’t think you have the time for it.” Cough Netflix. Cough.                                       These are excuses easily taken care of by TapasyaTapasya (Niyama #3.)

Swadhyaya is a path to freedom, as it is the practice of learning or un-learning all of the things that hold you back. Swadhyaya is a 2- Part agreement: first with yourself and secondly with your respect for learning.

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Part 1: Swadhyaya actually means to study the self, or self-analysis.

This agreement is with you and your best friend: also you. As your best friend, you need to know you better than anyone else. You need to listen & talk to you, trust, encourage, and love you.

 

Swadhyaya:

  • forges a deep connection and sustained communication with the higher self. This is miraculous if you think about it! Without any help from Facebook, you can intuitively receive information from everything around you. A breeze, a song, something someone says, a serendipitous run in, etc.
  • If you can see your life as one would read a book, or participate in any activity that cultivates a reflective consciousness you are practicing Swadhyaya.
  • The soul tends to be lured by activities that lead to discovery and illumination. Note: This is not the same as taking a quiz to see what your spirit animal is, but in reality any challenge can become an opportunity to learn about yourself.

Part 2: Don’t go Full Zombie. The moment that you think you know everything or that you know more than everyone else is the moment you die.

It may not have presented itself as “giving up” but that’s what it is.

  • Curiosity is your fuel signal lighting up on the dashboard: You need gas.
  • You have to feed your imagination. Travel. Read. Create.
  • Don’t know how or what? Start asking questions, or just start. You will learn in the process.

How you may have fallen into Full Zombie Mode:

  • It made sense at the time, an admittedly low point in your life… Try asking, “Why am I still here?”
  • Everyone else is doing it, so whatever… Ask yourself, “If someone drives down a one way street the wrong way, am I going to do it? 
  • Perhaps your cynicism is no longer manageable… But ask, “Why am I miserable?” “Why don’t I trust anything, Why don’t I want to know anything, or why don’t I care about my life?”

Whatever the reason: when you disengage from your life, you’re going full Zombie. It’s really f**** hard to come back from Full Zombie. 

Be forewarned, the Swadhyaya classroom is a relentless one.

  • In order to be a self-studier you become teacher and pupil. You are the only person who can design and adhere to the curriculum. You will instantly become aware of all of your negative tendencies, who you have turned into, and how terrible this may make you feel. Welcome and accept your limitations as this is where learning begins.

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In this practice of self-study you must find the source of…

Your anger..

Sadness..

Impatience..

or Self-loathing..  You will also learn how cunning you are and will be tried by your own deception.

Combing through these knots is teaching yourself to accept what you learn about you. This leads to true compassion and transforms your energy with everything around you.

The more we do this, the more we are free.